Hi there again...
when it comes to relationship, I have a fucking six years of long distance relationship with a man who also a little brother of my old friend. He's in army and a year younger than me.
Well, when others babbling around about how they cant stand with fucking "meet at two or three months a year", or some shit like that?! Hey, you outside there... I havent meet him for first four year of our relationship, because we were both still at school and I only meet him physically three times in a six year relationship.
Can you imagine... three times? But I do appreciate that moment with him~~
What I like about him, he knows how to give lemonade, when life gives him lemon. He's enduring some difficulties during his childhood and secondly, he's not Malay but dont worry he's Muslim. Even he's not funny, army style and not good looking, I knew that he is the man for me and he loves me the way I am.
Sometimes, I get jealous when my friends are getting married with the one they love or always going for date with their lover and I'm here was like " does he even exist to me?" or something like "does he cheating on me? yeah I'm just a fat girl and there are many hot girls out there" or probably something like "does he remember me? does he loved me?" although he convinced many times, along with some proof, but the doubt remain plays the part.
well, I know with his duty limits our chatting / meeting time but I do love him...What I want from inside my heart is if he could, spend some time off with me alone and we both going for some adventure or travelling. Also, he could introduce me formally to his family. Just in my dream, hmm...
I dont expect that our relationship lasts forever. My mother is okay with him, but IDK if mother thinks the same way due to some fucking circumstances (another reason why I'm having fucking trust issue with anyone, that hurts like a hell)
Before, I tried to forget him several times, but not for long time... I cant forget him.... He's too kind and sweet like dark chocolate. He also mentioned that he doesnt want to find another girl because I'm his light and life. Well, too sound like some old romantic line but I dont know what he sees in me.
To you, my love I might not be a good cooker, chubby, old fashioned, childish, easily get jealous or anything bad that I might done to you, I love you so much and no other man can be like you ~~
P/S: sometime, family comes first and mostly he spends his time with his family. I dont mind that but when I asked him to ask leave and he was like "oh no, too many things need to do this year and I cant just simply ask for a leave" emoticon crying
so, i'm the asshole one.. thank you and it happens now
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